The Crazy Girl's Handbook Page 3

  Chapter Two

  Colby exited the dugout dragging his feet and his duffle bag. He sighed when he reached me. “I didn’t even get a hit.” His gaze darted up to Sammy as his friend trudged over to Roman. “At least Sammy did. He even made it on base.”

  “Maybe next week you’ll get on base, too. You guys are all getting better every week. It’s tough catching up to kids who’ve played for longer than you, but you and Sammy can do it.” I tried to offer him an optimistic smile. He sighed again. “We’re going to go get some ice cream.” Maybe that would cheer him up.

  Colby’s shoulders rose and fell, but his expression brightened a little. “With Sammy and Mr. Carpenter?”

  He had no idea how much I wanted to say no. It was on the tip of my tongue to offer to take them both to that place with all the giant bounce houses, even though it smelled like sweat and I was positive all the slides were covered in snot and slobber. “Yeah,” I said with false excitement. “Won’t that be fun?”

  “You’re coming with us?” Sammy asked. His excitement was genuine as he smiled up at me. When I nodded, his smile widened even more.

  Finally, Colby smiled as well and hefted his bag onto his shoulder. “Can I have two scoops this time?”

  I think we all need two scoops after today. “Sure, bud. Let’s go.”

  Evan’s hand in mine, we turned and started for the car. Sammy raced up next to Colby and I had to hold in a groan when I realized Roman wasn’t far behind. “We usually go to that little shop next to the library. Unless you prefer somewhere else. I doubt the boys care much either way.”

  “The usual sounds fine to me.” Not quite as good as going home and putting peanut butter in my hair, but…

  Roman looked like he was trying not to laugh again, but he spared me any more embarrassment and directed Sammy away from Colby and toward his truck. It was a nice truck. One of those big ones that looked like it could drive over the top of all the other cars on the road. Lydia would never be caught dead in something like that, but I found myself kind of liking it as we walked past to my Jetta.

  After getting Evan buckled into his booster seat, I walked around the car and got in. As soon as I sat down, Colby said, “Aunt Greenly, you’ve got something in your hair.”

  Evan giggled guiltily. I sighed. “Yeah. I know. Evan’s grounded from gum for the rest of the weekend.”

  Both boys started laughing then, and I found it hard to resist joining them. The whole situation really was ridiculous. In a better mood by the time we made it to the little ice cream shop that had been there for as long as I could remember, I’d forgotten about my hair until I tried to brush it back from my face and my hand came away with a chunk of hair stuck to it. “Ugh, yuck.”

  Something waved in front of my face, startling me into pulling my hand back, which led to me yanking my hair. Evan’s voice called up to me as he waved a ball cap at me. “Here, Auntie Greenly, Mr. Sammy’s Dad said you could borrow his hat so no one sees your hair all gross.”

  And there was my old friend mortification again. Yep. Is this day over yet? Snatching the hat out of his hand, I twisted my long blonde hair into a hasty knot and shoved the hat on my head to wedge it in place. “Thanks,” I grumbled.

  Evan dashed off to the door of the ice cream shop with the other two boys as I tried to rein in my irritation. I almost jumped when Roman slipped up next to me. “That’s not what I said,” he claimed. “What I told Evan was that you might be worried about someone noticing the gum and probably wanted a hat to cover it.” He chuckled as he pinched a loose strand of hair between his fingers and tucked it under the cap. “I did not call your hair gross.”

  He walked away to catch up with the boys then. Maybe one of the kids would dump ice cream on me and wrap this afternoon up in style. Giving in to the inevitability of more embarrassment, I dragged myself into the little shop. All three boys were ogling the available flavors, though Evan could barely see over the counter and was trying to get Colby to lift him up. Not sure the seven-year-old would be able to help him out much, I started toward him. Roman beat me to it.

  Scooping Evan up from the ground, he hefted the little guy into his arms and held him over the heads of the other two boys so he could see. An animated discussion about the various flavors broke out and suddenly I wasn’t mad at Lydia anymore. I was mad at myself.

  Roman was a good guy. The boys clearly adored him. Sammy seemed like a great kid, and while I had no idea whether or not the boy’s mom was in the picture, I had no doubt Roman was a big part of why Sammy had turned out so well. Yes, the guys Lydia usually tried to set me up with were questionable, but she did it because she wanted me to be happy. Would it really have been that horrible to let her fix me up one more time? I shivered, remembering what had spurred me to overreact in the first place, but stuffed it away quickly. That hadn’t had anything to do with Roman or Lydia. Why couldn’t I have just done what she’d asked for the hundredth time and met Roman at a nice restaurant instead of at a baseball game with gum in my hair?

  Now he thought I was Lydia’s weird little sister who seemed to hate men and cancelled dates at the last minute while giving gum to four year olds and making scenes. Stellar first impression, Greenly. I was so focused on my pity party I jumped when someone touched my arm.

  “What flavor do you want?” Roman asked, pretending he hadn’t notice I’d completely zoned out. “My treat.”

  “Oh, no, you don’t have to do that, really.” The last thing I needed was to feel like I owed this guy even more.

  Roman grinned. “Actually, I do. Lydia and James bought ice cream for everyone last week. It’s my turn.” He nudged me toward the counter. “Pick a flavor before the boys’ ice creams melt and we have to hose them down before letting them get back in the cars.”

  Glancing over at the boys, all three were digging into their double scoop cones. Only Evan had ice cream rivulets running down his hands as he licked the very top of his ice cream. Grimacing, I plucked a few napkins out of the dispenser on the counter and put them in my pocket for later. When I turned back, Roman was still waiting expectantly.

  “Turtle pecan,” I said with a sigh.

  Roman nodded, gave the girl behind the counter my order and his, and then walked around me to the cashier to pay for the treats. I turned my attention back to the boys, who were now testing out each other’s ice cream flavors, and screwed my face up at the ice cream now running down to Evan’s elbows.

  “Here you go,” a perky voice chirped behind me. She held out two cones, though she looked disappointed to be handing them over to me instead of Roman.

  “Thanks,” I said as I took them both. Roman was right beside me when I turned around, but luckily I’d spotted him returning before having the chance to be startled by his abrupt arrival and do something embarrassing. I wished he’d stop sneaking up behind me like that. I definitely did not need any more help looking like a fool today. Handing over his cone, I said, “Tell the girl thanks. It’ll make her day.”

  Eyeing me and my so not enthusiastic tone, Roman shook his head. He did, however take my advice. When he caught the girl’s attention and thanked her for the ice cream, she beamed at him. She looked to be in her early twenties…maybe. Roman wasn’t unpleasant to look at by any means, but I was a little surprised she was so eager to flirt with a guy who was here with his kid. For that matter, he was here with me and the boys, too. Didn’t that give the girl even a little pause? How’d she know we weren’t together?

  Before I let myself get too irritated, I took a step back into the realm of reality. Did I look like the type of woman Roman Carpenter would be dating? Even after sitting out in the heat for hours on end and wrestling gum from my hair, he looked perfect. I, on the other hand, did not. Not even close. I couldn’t even remember if I bothered to put on more than mascara that morning before leaving the house. She probably thought I was his little sister or something.

  “I know it’s warm, but we might
want to head outside before Evan covers the entire floor in melted ice cream,” Roman said. He didn’t wait for me to respond, walking away to herd the boys out of the air conditioned shop to the one table outside. The umbrella it sported wasn’t going to do much against the heat, but I followed.

  By the time I sat down, all three boys were covered in ice cream and I thought a hose might really be necessary. Evan had one hand on the top of his ice cream, attempting to keep the second scoop from falling off. I seriously doubted his hands were clean. He didn’t seem to care. “Is everybody’s ice cream good?” I asked.

  Sammy and Colby nodded happily, but Evan held his up to me. “Taste it, Auntie Greenly. It’s yummy!”

  I tried not to show my disgust at the idea and leaned down with a plastic smile. One quick flick of my tongue later, I hoped I hadn’t licked a part he’d put his dirty hands all over. “Mmm,” I said, “very good.”

  Pleased I’d liked it, Evan turned back around and went to work on devouring the rest of his ice cream. Roman was, of course, trying not to laugh at me. He pushed away from the wall he’d been leaning against and walked over to me. “You have the best facial expressions, do you know that?”

  Great, another talent to add to the list of ways I could embarrass myself. “Gee, thanks.”

  He chuckled, but didn’t go back to where he’d been standing. “Sammy’s mom used to get grossed out by things like that, too. She’d wash his pacifier every time he dropped it on the floor until she finally gave up on a losing battle.”

  “I can’t even imagine what germs are on his hands after crawling around the bleachers all afternoon.”

  “You’re just giving your immune system something to do,” he teased. He licked his ice cream again, and for some reason, I watched him do it. Which he noticed, of course. There was laughter in his eyes as he offered it to me. “You want to taste mine, too? Promise it’s mostly germ-free.”

  “Mostly?”

  “Well, I have been licking it…”

  That was way more appealing than tasting Evan’s mess of an ice cream cone, but I shook my head. “Thanks, but no.”

  Roman threw me a skeptical look, but went back to eating his ice cream.

  The silence was welcome as everybody slurped and licked, but I found my mind going back to Roman’s earlier comment and my curiosity got the better of me. “Sammy’s mom…is she still, um, in the picture at all?” Ugh, it sounded like I was fishing to find out whether or not he was available, which I was sure held zero appeal for him right now when it came to me.

  Instead of looking grossed out by the thought, Roman shrugged. “Some, when it’s convenient.” He took another lick of his ice cream before continuing. “She’s an actress. Right now she’s traveling with an off Broadway show and isn’t around much. Even when she was, though, her career was always more important.”

  He said it like he’d made his peace with the situation, but I could see the slight tightening of his features when he talked about her. It had taken me a while to place Sammy’s name during the gum incident, but once I’d had a chance to think about it, I remembered hearing about him from both the boys and Lydia. “Well, you seem to be doing a pretty good job with Sammy on your own. He seems like a great kid. I know Colby thinks he’s pretty awesome and Lydia loves having him over to play.”

  Roman’s features lost their edginess and he smiled. “Thanks.” He finished off the last of his ice cream and regarded me seriously. “So, why haven’t you been to any of Colby’s games before this? Lydia made it sound like you and the boys are really close.”

  Annoyed that he was basically calling my sister a liar and me a lazy aunt, I gave him a pointed look. “One of the weekend librarians where I work quit rather suddenly and they haven’t found a replacement. I’ve been filling in.”

  Nodding, Roman seemed to consider my answer. Did he not believe me? Why would I lie about something like that?

  “How about the New Year’s party your sister had a while back?”

  Put off by his nosiness, I tossed the last bite of cone into my mouth and folded my arms. “My old roommate was getting married in Laughlin. I was a bridesmaid.”

  Now Roman folded his arms. “What about…” He paused, watching me as my temper rose, then broke out into a huge grin. “I’m just giving you a hard time, Greenly.” He laughed when I pulled back. “Sorry, sorry, I couldn’t resist. You do seem to have been avoiding me up until now, but hey, I don’t like being set up either. I was just teasing.”

  “I wasn’t avoiding anyone,” I said petulantly. I was pouting. I was so pouting right now and I hated it. What else could I say to this guy? It wasn’t him, it was me? Or my sister, more accurately? I was not even going there. Even if it was true. Partly.

  Before Roman could come up with another witty remark, Evan shrieked, “Auntie Greenly, help!” I turned toward him just as the last of his sloppy ice cream toppled off the cone and onto my foot. He looked down at the ice cream, then up at me. “Oops.”

  Hitting my limit right about then, I shook off my foot, extracted the wad of napkins from my pocket, and looked at Roman while I wiped goop off my toes. “Thank you for the ice cream, but I think I’ve had enough embarrassment for one day.” I turned away from him to look at my nephews. “Boys, let’s go. Thor needs to be let out anyway.”

  Roman was doing his very best not to laugh at me again, but Sammy didn’t even try to hide his snickering. Neither did Colby, for that matter. It was so time to go home. Offering a curt nod to our ice cream buddies, I shuffled the boys to the car, sticky flip flop making slurping sounds with each step. Gross.

  It was time to get on with my original plans for Valentine’s Day. Order in pizza, start up Netflix, have a slumber party with the boys, and not think about men of any variety—especially not Roman Carpenter.